I had my first random belly-toucher a couple weeks ago.

I walked into a local burger joint for lunch, and it’s like my baby bump hypnotized her. She walked towards me, eyes wide and hands outstretched as I contemplated how to deal with this somewhat awkward, unfamiliar (and seemingly slow-motion) situation.

Luckily, she stopped about an inch short of my belly and said, “Do you mind if I touch?”

I smiled and said, “I don’t mind. Thank you for asking first.”

She got a good rub of the Buddha belly and went on her way, which got me thinking about my personal rules for the remaining 10 weeks of my pregnancy.

Now that I’m actually showing (and not just in that awkward “is she chubby, or is she pregnant?” phase), I’m bound to have people wanting to touch my belly, make comments on it and ask me questions.

For the most part, I am OK with the belly comments and the personal questions, but there are things that bother me. That’s why I’ve come up with a couple ground rules for my pregnancy.

1. DO NOT TOUCH MY FREAKIN’ BELLY UNLESS YOU ASK FIRST. The most obvious part of this being that you should want to make sure I’m actually pregnant before you go invading my space. If a stranger ever does go for the rubdown without my consent, I will not hesitate to make a fool of them by fibbing and saying, “Excuse me? Do you think I’m pregnant? That’s actually a food baby you’re touching!”

Why not have a little fun with it, eh?

2. Never use the following words when commenting on my belly: fat, huge, twins (or triplets, etc), massive, enormous, monstrous…you get the idea. I don’t mind the occasional, “Gee, your belly is getting big!” comment, but if you start asking if there are twins in there I will not be happy.

When my belly first started popping out, Link was very proud of his tact when he said: “Wow, you’re looking a lot more pregnant lately!” He even avoided using the word “big.” Well done, sir!

3. As a pregnant woman, I expect to be asked questions about whether I plan to breastfeed, give birth naturally, get an epidural, vaccinate my newborn and all that good stuff. I, personally, don’t understand why so many women are put off by these questions as if it’s a huge personal line being crossed. I see it as someone trying to take an interest in my pregnancy, and I welcome it as a kind gesture, not as some overly personal interrogation.

That being said,I have a major problem with someone who argues with me or tells me I’m wrong after I answer their barrage of questions.

I feel as though I’m capable of birthing/raising our child the way Link and I choose and just because someone asks me a question does not mean I want their opinion/advice. If you disagree with me, especially if you’re not family, be prepared to keep your opinion to yourself or Mama Bear will whip out her claws. (I’d like to think this is a belief/rule held by all pregnant women).

So far these three simple rules are the only ones I could think of that are important enough to publicize. Now that I’m pregnant they all seem like common sense to me, but looking back I have definitely broken them with other pregnant women before I was put in the situation myself.

Let’s just hope no unassuming little old ladies try to touch my belly without my consent while I’m in a bad mood. That just wouldn’t end well.

A twenty-week ultrasound is a magical thing, indeed. I went into my latest appointment with images of my ten-week ultrasound in my mind, which were incredible all on their own. What would I see this time? How much had Baby grown? I was amazed, in those first moments of my appointment, to not only hear a heartbeat whooshing along at 140 beats per minute, but to also actually see a four chambered heart beating beating beating before my eyes.

My husband and I are both the first-born children in our families, and we both have many first-born personality traits. We’re driven, competitive, and confident, and we like to overcome challenges. Which is why we’re trying to conceive again only two months after the miscarriage.

This pregnancy felt like a tease. I was so excited that we had actually done it – we were making a baby – and then, suddenly, it was all over. Knowing that all our parts work and we were able to get the process started makes me want it even more. I’m ready to have a healthy, successful pregnancy as soon as I possibly can. And, for us, it feels like the right thing to do.

Another first-born trait I possess: I don’t share well. It has been a struggle for me to share my story on this blog, even as I encourage others to be more open about miscarriages and other pregnancy complications. I have been able to talk to friends and family about what I’m going through, but I’ve discovered I’m not comfortable discussing it in such a public forum.

So this will be my final blog post. I appreciate everyone who has read and commented on my posts, and I hope you’ll continue reading the other Bavia bloggers’ posts. I also wish you all happy and healthy pregnancies!

From Bavia: Dear Lori, We have admired your courage to continue to tell this important story despite your loss. We wish you the very best as your pursue your dream of motherhood.

It’s time for this pregnant lady to hang up the ol’ ice cream scoop.

That’s right – at my pre-natal appointment this week, I got “the talk.” They told me I’ve gained too much weight in too little time.

Isn’t that what every woman wants to hear? Ugh.

Naturally, after my appointment, I took a trip to Starbucks and ordered the biggest salted caramel mocha that I’ve ever seen. I might as well drown my sorrows and cut the sugar and carbs tomorrow, right?

I also took a trip to Target and bought a new bra to perk me up a bit (in more ways than one). A little retail therapy never hurt anyone!

I shouldn’t be surprised by the sudden weight gain; unfortunately, gaining weight comes easily to me. I’ve always been a bit on the heavy side. But in the two years before I got pregnant, I lost 65 pounds. When I got pregnant, I was the thinnest I’d been since middle school.

When I first learned of my pregnancy, I expressed my concerns to Link in the form of major insecurities: Will you still find me attractive when my belly is jelly-licious after I have the baby? When my stretch marks come back, will you be grossed out? And heaven forbid: What if I end up with a big, flat “mom-butt”?!

Of course, Link has been more than reassuring. He even called me on his lunch break after my appointment to tell me how pretty I am and that he’ll help me be more accountable for what I’m eating. (Isn’t he a sweetheart?) Heck, I didn’t lose those 65 pounds until after we started dating, so I know for a fact he finds the chubbier version of me attractive!

Clearly, Link finding me attractive is the least of my worries. The weight gain has officially gone to my head and screwed with my already-screwy hormones. I found out I’ve gained 10 pounds in the last four weeks … and, well, that seems rough. I’ve gained more weight in the last four weeks than I have since April! (Damn you, White Castle!)

My total weight gain now, at 24 weeks pregnant, is 18 pounds. Not bad, considering my knack for gaining weight in the past, but I need to reel it in a bit.

I’ve touched on my picky eating habits in previous posts, but I don’t think it’s possible to make people understand just how picky I am unless they know me personally. I’ve tried eating salad. I’ve tried eating green veggies in many forms. I’ve tried eating tomatoes fresh from the garden. I just can’t gag any of it down.

Fruit is my only hope, and it’s so sugary I shouldn’t be eating too much of it.

It’s time to cut down on carbs and sugars and focus on protein. So here is my plea to you: Does anyone have any tips/ideas for healthy, protein-filled snacks that won’t make me want to gag or rip out my tongue? Or ideas for healthier carbs?

I may not be best friends with salad by the end of this, but it obviously wouldn’t hurt to incorporate some healthier protein snacks.

As for you, evil White Castle temptress, you are hereby relegated to biweekly payday lunches only.